smk_ooc | Character Meet and Greet

"Me convince you of something you'd rather not? Naahhh... It's all in good fun! I promise this hardly counts as a temptation at all!"

Said while still pawing through the racks. As it turned out many of the villains these outfits depicted were women and while that didn't bother him in the slightest some of these were a little too revealing, and therefore too cruel, to foist on an angel.

He pulled out a dark 'Evil Queen' number. Her long purple robes were something like they would have worn back in ancient times and it did have that lovely black cape perfect for hiding large white wings. Seemed perfect, though he did hold it out to give Azriaphale veto powers.

"How about this? They'd never know you!"

Good fun, he says. Aziraphale doesn't see much fun about it. Oh he likes camp and costumes as much as the next... the next...gentleman, but it's one thing to get costumed and it's quite another to pick something out for someone else. It had taken him long enough to get the gardener and that was only because he was reminded of a hilarious skit he'd seen one day while popping into Wales for some Picau ar y maen.

He glances at the costume and-- it looks like something a demon would pick out honestly.

"It's very cloak and dagger. I'm not sure I can pull it off, but I suppose it will have to do."

As for Crowely... He has no idea. Finally he picks out something that could be called the exact opposite of cowboy chic, so far opposite, in fact, that it's near crossing the line to being chic again, though hasn't quite reached it.

"You might have to pick your own, dear."

He snorted at Aziraphale's indecision. All these costumes, the angel could suggest he dress as anything from a Princess to a Fairy and he chose the one outfit that looked like something out of a Vogue magazine.

"Picking my own defeats the purpose, you know what I'd pick..."

He thumbed the last outfit Aziraphale had had his hands on and agreed this would probably have been it.

"I'd loose the tie, bow ties only look good on angels, but I probably would have picked this."

"Well..." A sly smile. "What I'd really like to pick..." No but he can't say that.

That is...very dangerous to say and he's not entirely certain if it would be welcomed. And so:

"Is this." And he pulls out a sequined jumpsuit in the style of Elvis, not that he has a good grasp on who Elvis is other than his hips were Disapproved of for a time.

"The 50's!"

Said with more delight than the fashions of the era really deserved.

"I could do the 50's again."

As if to prove the point he attempted an Elvis style hip swivel. He didn't quite have Elvis's technique down but he did have the hips for it and snakes could shimmie. The move sort of became his own.

"Hm?" That little movement was completely decadent. He was completely taken in by the motion for a reason he couldn't describe.

Wiley serpent.

"What?" there had been a conversation. "Oh, yes, fifties. Does it suit?"

"It could work."

As he had proved he thought, but he looked over his shoulder at Azriaphale and leaned close enough to hiss a wiley old question near the angel's ear.

"But is that what you would really like to pick?"

After all you can't start off hesitant like that and not expect it to be commented on.

"Ahaha, Crowley, please," he pushed him away a little. That tickled horribly when he did that.

"Well I have really picked it, haven't I?" He held the jumpsuit up to him. "It works rather well against your skintone, I think."

Pushed away again but this time, with the laugh and that word please spoke so wonderfully hushed, it felt more like a delightful little game than a rejection.

"Alright, alright," He would let the angel get away with it but not without a knowing smirk to let Azriaphale know that was what was happening here.

"Changing room's that way."

Crowley bobbed his head at the backroom, but stood back to allow the other man to take the lead.

"After you, your Majesty."

He smiles. "I am merely a humble principality. You won't turn my head that easily, you old snake."

But he does look pleased as he takes the...garment from Crowley that he is meant to wear. God help him. And heads back to the dressing room. He's never liked modern dressing rooms, alas. Gone were the days of tailors where you could have the room to yourself, or have them come to you! Now it was just pack yourself in a tiny room and hope you fit while trying on clothes that came in array of standard sizes and none of them were the right ones, it felt like. At least he could still get tailors this day and age but they were few and far between and here? He clicked his tongue.

Oh, well. Needs must, he supposed! He hung up the dress and went to take off his coat when he realized that there was a problem.

"Bugger."

How on Earth was he to manage getting it off with his wings in the way? They were irritatingly corporeal too and no amount of concentration could make them otherwise, not even a little.

"I am not going to cut holes in this coat to get them out!" He grumbled. "Do you hear me, you cursed wizard?"

How he was supposed to do anything was beyond him.

They were parted for mere minutes before Crowley snaked back over to the dressing cubical Azriaphale had strayed into with a cheery,

"Angel are you decent?"

And a flop on the top of the door frame so he could peer in even before he had been given the answer.

"So this plan... minor flaw really. I forgot the wings were a constant thing now."

He holds the dress against him on instinct, even though he hasn't gotten anything off yet.

"Honestly, you're supposed to wait for an answer before looking over."

He sighed and looked at the dress once more, not entirely disappointed in not having to wear it.

"I suppose this idea is out. But we have to figure out something that doesn't involve a frightful amount of holes."

Modesty. Demons as a general rule didn't worry that much about it so he snerked at the idea the angel was concerned about being caught out.

"I apologize, I forgot about that entirely."

But if that were true it didn't stop him for very long.

"New idea. We lay low for a while. A day in hiding and they will have forgotten all about it. "

Or they would have been tracked down and made to pay for the damage, either way, it's not like they could run or hide very well trapped in this bloody small park.

"So we get some wine, I met a lady down at the local pub or what functions at the local pub, anyway point is, I could call her up get a few bottles and then you and I could hide out in that horrible pink princess room. We can work out what to do about your jacket without taking scissors to it once we get there."

"I'm sure." He gives the demon a dry look, not trusting him at his word, naturally. But then perks up a bit as he continues.

"Probably a better idea." And he's much more comfortable with that sort of thing. Honestly. He did like pantomime as much as the next person but too much was too much and things were awkward enough. He places the dress back on the hanger and puts it up.

"Anyway, I never could play Wicked Queen very well," he says as he opens the door to the dressing room, pressing Crowley out of the way and pausing to look up at him, only the door between them.

"At least not in this situation..." He gives the demon a slow smirk before heading out, quite pleased with himself.

Truthfully he was more comfortable with that as well. Not that he minded costumes, they were actually pretty entertaining really. Dressing up as some one else and fooling everyone into believing that was who you actually were was an interesting way to spread a little chaos. But Azriaphale as the Evil Queen... Some how it didn't seem quite right to hide those brilliant white features.

"You're not the woodsman."

He said dryly, before following along. As it turned out getting the wine was as easy as he said a quick phone call, borrowing the gift shop's phone while the owner was busy, soon had them on their way with several bottles of decent but not above average wine and a few glasses.

Crowley's mood took a little down turn however when they reentered their flat. All peach and perfect, it looked exactly like some thing an angel would love... and maybe that was why Azriaphale seemed so much more at home here than out on those streets. He however found it a little depressing. It was just too much.

Flopping on his bed he reached for a bottle and popped the cork. Two glasses, stat, very much seemed to be in order.

Honestly he was trying to be cheeky. How can Crowley be a demon and not get a double entendre as blatant as that? it must be because they travel in such different circles it can't be helped. But, well, it's not terribly important.

"No, but I do enjoy them from time to time." Said in an offhanded way.

The worries fade as they procure the wine, and disappear altogether when they reach the room unaccosted. It's a pleasant room, to be sure. Luxurious. The decor is a little tacky, but he'd prefer it over a cot in an alley, especially with the wing situation the way it is. Anyway, they're likely to be here a week at most, if not a little less, so he's fine with it.

He sits and, after a brief moment to adjust his wings, moans a little in comfort as he sinks against the buttery velvet.

"At least it feels good if nothing else. Though I don't know how we're going to come up with enough" he makes a face. "Munny to afford it."

He started the entendre, he hadn't expected an angel to end it. That and his thoughts had wandered. He admitted that only to himself. For as Azriaphale had walked past him, temporarily trapped behind that door, the angel's wings had brushed past his cheek. A remarkable occurrence he didn't imagine would come by again without a little more coy persuasion. When they got back to that room... He told himself.

Only he had forgotten the room wasn't his nice stylishly modern flat it was that touristy one size fits all type. Depressing... They hadn't skimped on the bedding that was very true. Even if it was peach it was still soft and if he closed his eyes it might even have been comfortable.

He poured out two glasses of wine and left his perch to walk over and land next to Azriaphale, sitting on the angel's chosen bed, close to his side with the perfect pretense for it all. He handed the man his drink.

"The room's free for a while, after that... I do have a few ideas in mind."

"Mm. Thank you." He sips the wine and sighs, relaxing a little more.

"What idea is that?" He glances at the demon absently. "Nothing too untoward I hope. I won't do it, you know, and you can't convince me." Whatever it was. He was still an angel after all. But even as he spoke his voice was casual, lazy almost. It was amazing what a comfortable room could do.

And, as he sipped his wine and shifted a wing, if his feathers brushed lightly against Crowley when he relaxed again, it was hardly worth commenting on.

"Nothing untoward you." A beat. "Not about that... I could think of other untowardly things."

What was he trying to say? And this before even the first sip of wine! He corrected that by having one before he leaned back on Azriaphale's pillow like it were a back rest.

"What I meant was. I have a few ideas in mind for jobs I could do. If any of those pan out we shouldn't be hurting for money. We could live wherever we wanted to."

He had used the word 'we' more than once in there, absently, like it were a forgone conclusion that as they had moved in together once they might remain that way even when they were finally kicked out of this dump.

Edited (typo x 2) 2019-07-03 04:05 (UTC)

"I bet you could." He eyed him lying on the bed, no lounging on it more like. Aziraphale wasn't given much to sleep but at some points he could see the appeal of having to lounge next to him. He thought to comment on this but then thought better of it.

"Mm, well I couldn't let you do all the work." It wouldn't be fair and he didn't want Crowley to have to support him. Down that way lie madness and unfortunate circumstances. "I suppose I'll have to find some form of...employment as well." He made a face. "You know I only ever sold books, quite reluctantly I might add, to show some revenue for those bloody tax people. Pardon my French. They checked me five times and couldn't find a single mistake or sin." He raises his wine glass in a toast and drinks more of it.

"Of course I also have things set aside for a rainy day because you simply can't miracle everything. Not the way they go on about it." He rolls his eyes heavenward.

"Anyway, knowing your er...job types, we'll need something to fall back on when it goes..." What had he used? "Fruit shaped." Close enough. "But it won't be so bad. Hopefully we won't be here too much longer and then can go back to our routine."

That was the tragic part of all this. It may have been Azriaphale's bed but he had never spent much time in it. If he had the pillow Crowley lounged against might have smelled of the angel's distinctive cologne. It annoyed him that it didn't. And it annoyed him that that annoyed him.

He had been acting strange since he arrived in the Kingdom and discovered Azriaphale had as well. This was something he decided as the sharpness of the alcohol brought new clarity or something like that... Maybe it was just the room. Outside everything seemed optimistic and full of new possibilities, in here everything seemed very closed in, very eternal peace and tranquility. Any moment he expected a choir of angels to appear and start singing.

First opportunity and they were moving.

"Afraid of becoming a kept angel?"

Crowley nursed his drink by downing half of it and refilling the glass.

"You should have done it, left just one flaw right in the middle of all those perfect tax forms just to see if those revenue people could actually find it. They wouldn't have. I helped to invent the tax form, something so ingeniously complex that people spend half the year worrying about it and the month it's due taking out that frustration on everyone else. Even the people who are supposed to enforce the tax laws don't really understand them!"

He took that toast but only after adding an accomplishment of his own. See? He could be diabolically clever.

"Pear. It's pear-shaped." He offered some what grumpily, "And my plans don't always end up that way. There's no reason to think I won't be able to hold down a job. Might not be a bookshop where books are never sold, but I did live in an expensive flat and that wasn't all due to my demonic powers. I'm sure you wouldn't like whatever I came up with, but there is always an underground of hidden jobs... smuggling, gambling, escort services... Even in a place as seemingly perfect as this."

Oh, would you look at that! His glass was empty. This was quickly corrected as he quieted momentarily. Azriaphale was in such a rush to leave this place and get back to, what? A touch a sincerity slipped into his tone, as his concern for the angel slipped out in softly spoken words.

"We didn't have much time left when we were pulled here. Days, hours maybe. What happens if we can't go back? There maybe nothing to go back to."

"Mm." Was the only thing he could say to the kept angel comment. It just wasn't fair that Crowley should do all the work and he wouldn't be able to be comfortable just laying about whilst acknowledging it. The other thing is, well, there's a certain amount of debt entailed in that sort of arrangement, even subtly. And he's not entirely sure if he wants to owe Crowley anything. If only because the possibilities are a bit ear singeing and he's not quite stupid enough to bring them to the fore.

He's also not surprised that Crowley helped with the tax system, but can't help but feel a measure of justified pride, even glowing faintly with it, not that he notices.

"I understand it. Every single little detail and loophole. It too me a fortnight but I can quote it back to you, if you'd like. And I could have put a flaw in there, but I am an Angel and don't do that sort of thing." Besides that was very much a Seed of Evil and if it were there to be discovered, chances are it would be-- This would result in him being very embarrassed by it, not to mention facing a potential inquiry at head office where he would have to justify it.

And he could, naturally. He had gotten good about that. Though the thought makes him guilty and he has to refill his own cup after thinking it. But he doesn't want to spend any more time in head office than he absolutely has to. It's funny as he hasn't seen Gabriel in decades, almost a century in fact! But one encounter was more than enough to last him and he'd seen him at least twice now.

Also now he wanted a pear.

He sips at his wine, raising his eyebrows at the demon's list of job opportunities, none of them particularly surprising.

"Not an escort, surely." Honestly. There was tempting humans and then there was...fulfilling said temptation and he couldn't imagine Crowley knowing a mortal in the Biblical sense and didn't think he wanted to.

At the last, though, he can't help but feel the gloom-- almost fear! at the thought of nothing to come back to. That it would all be-- That Earth would be--! But he was expected in Heaven and to be a moment of their shining triumph, whatever that entailed. An eternity of Celestial Harmonies. He winced, took another long swallow.

"That's why we--" No. "I have to find a way to get back before that happens. I can't just give up. I can't just let humanity suffer because of us. They never asked for us, you know. We just happened to them and keep happening and it doesn't seem right. Sometimes I think it would be better if we weren't around at all and they were left wholly to themselves to learn and grow, which I'm sure was what the intention was to begin with. But who knows. It's ineffable." He frowned and drank more.

"And even if there's nothing left, well-- no I can't just leave. I won't abandon Heaven just like that, so stop trying to tempt me into it." Because he knew he would. "I'm going to stop listening to you if you do."

"Naturally you understand it, you've always been clever, the point wasn't to try and trick you it was to spread disharmony in those people who couldn't understand it."

And he took a certain amount of pride in that. Clever angel able to see through his plots... really bloody annoying. The angel scruples too, though he expected that. Azriaphale wouldn't have been all in for a seed of evil no matter how funny it would have been.

Crowley leaned back on his commandeered pillow to watch the angel over there judging him with his wine and his perfect white eyebrows. If he weren't so familiar with Azriaphale he might have been more offended but as he was he just shrugged before making a sort of dismissive 'aahh' noise.

"Maybe not escort. Think I can consider that more of an option of last resort if everything else falls through."

He was a demon, meant to be working towards Armageddon and the glorious final battle but he didn't care for it anymore than Azriaphale did. The thought that everything he had grown to love about that world would just be gone. No more flat, no more terrified house plants, no more Bentley or humans doing wonderful little human things. No more little bookshops... Oh look, some how his glass was empty again.

"If you say ineffable to me one more time..."

A hollow threat so it was never finished.

"I only meant we should be thinking ahead just in case we end up trapped here for longer than either of us think we will be. Are you planning on taking up their cause? Fighting for these humans as hard as you are that lot we were pulled away from?"

He can't help but beam at the compliment, feathers floofing a little though he doesn't notice. Of course he's clever. But he's also very thorough. It would take a lot to get past him. He hums, further pleased that an escort is going to be near the bottom of the list. Though he'd make a very good one.

He reached for the wine bottle the same time Crowley did, fingers brushing against the others as he took it for himself and didn't share.

"Ineffable," he said, just to tease him. He poured wine for himself and kept the bottle at his other side so the snake couldn't get to it easily. This was an action he regretted not a bit as Crowley spoke again.

"I wish you hadn't put it that way. I'm not entirely sure you didn't do it on purpose." He knew why Crowley would prefer they stay. "I can't say no, can I? After all, God is the God of everywhere." He pours himself another glass and drinks it down. He can find a way out of it if he wanted, he was sure. Justification on justification. But was it right just to leave these people behind? Was hat part of the plan?

He didn't want to fight for these people as well, but that was what an Angel was made for.

Reaching for a bottle that suddenly and cruelly was no longer there he chased after it, his arm reaching over Azriaphale's person as he made a lunge and very nearly caught the fleeing liquid but suddenly the world spun. The chase was instantly abandoned as his hand came to rest on Azriaphale's chest, a steadying anchor he used to prevent himself tumbling right off the bed.

"Oh angel..."

He groaned as his forehead came to rest on Azriaphale's shoulder.

"Be careful of that stuff... powerful."

He took a deep breath and held it as if doing so might lessen some of the vertigo.

"I only had a glass!"

The numbers were played out on his free hand. A glass had become two, or had it been three, worse... four.

"Or... several. You know, just occurred to me. If our powers are all wo-- won-- messed up, we can't just make ourselves sober again can we?"

The word 'Ineffable' brought out a low snarl but finding the power to right himself still felt a long way off to him. At least here there was that comforting scent of angelic cologne.

"I didn't have anything to do with bringing us out here. I never even heard of this place before and fighting corruption, I am corruption, not my thing, I would have chosen a vacation world with a better nightlife."

One might notice that this was a vacation world and it probably did have a nightlife but not one that impressed demons very much apparently. It was all too 'family friendly'. Probably even had 'Not-So-Scary Halloween Parties'.

"But, mind you... who says that all the time, mind you? It is an idea! If we can't stop the End Times seems like it's better to leave than to get swept away in it. I was thinking about it. Leaving. Just you and me and a whole galaxy of worlds. We could just run away together."

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject